New Puppies and a Sad Departure

The American celebration of New Year is supposed to go something like this:

• New Year's Resolution
• Out with the old
• In with the new
• Par-tay!

This year my out with the old in with the new was a bit mixed up. On December 29th, just after 1pm MST, my boyfriend's dog Mali gave birth to seven healthy pups. While a few did not make it, the surviving pups eventually tipped the scale toward joy and celebration for me. "In with the New" was complete for me.

For a bit, I thought "Out with the old" referred to all of the baggage I carried around this past year. But on New Year's morning, I found out what this phrase would mean for me. Shaha'la, a beautiful twelve year old German Shepherd who had become a part of my life, suddenly became very ill. A stroke. An annurism...who knows. She could not walk, was sick to her stomach and seemed completely disoriented. We decided it was time.

I took her to a nearby animal clinic. The drive there was very sad and reflective. When Jon carried her out to my truck, I thought back to all the times she would have loved to take a ride with me. How ironic that her only ride with me would be her last.

I cried nearly the entire way to the animal clinic. They put her in a nice room for me and we lay on the floor together. I showed her my Zuni Bear and asked him to protect her. I assured her that the Bear would meet her on the other side. I assured her of my love for her and that I would be with her 'til the end. She was calm when the doctor came in to administer the overdoses of drugs. I blessed her with my Zuni bear and she cuddled against me as he gave her the first dose. She leaned back into my body and relaxed. Then the other drugs were given and I was amazed at how quickly she went. I held her there in my arms for a bit, feeling her breath on my hand from her nostrils. Then...she was gone.

They left us alone in there. I asked for five minutes. Shaha'la's spirit was hovering above me or already on it's journey to her Native people. I clipped her nails as keepsakes. Originally I planned to bury them all in a private ceremony. I will definitely do this, but I will also keep a few for my medicine bag. Shaha'la had a strong spirit and I know her strength, courage, and protection will go with me wherever I go.